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Thread: Universal Transformonsters

  1. #1
    bolt-on ben's Avatar
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    Universal Transformonsters

    I'm sure these will all suck, so I don't want to have separate threads until we "need" them.

    Here is a rumored plot description for the Mummy remake

    The story follows Navy Seal Tyler Colt and his mission in the Iraqi dessert to find a group of terrorists hiding out in a bunker. To him and his teams surprise the terrorists within the bunker turn out be nothing more then some grave robbers who have all magically died. Upon entering the bunker Tyler and his team also succumb to some mystical forces out of their control. They soon realize the bunker they have infiltrated is actually a centuries old tomb. Mayhem erupts as all the Navy seal members start turning on one another and are captivated by the forces within the tomb. Tyler is the only one to make it all the way deep within the tomb alive to find an Black Iron Sarcophagus. Itís marked with Egyptian symbols like the Ankh and Eye of Horus. Here Tyler is entranced by the forces to open up and release what is inside. But after placing his hand onto the sarcophagus he is immediately stabbed in the palm with a star shaped symbol. From then on his mind is cursed with visions of Ashurbanipal, King of AssyriaÖ..The Mummy.


    UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HHHHHHHHHH

    http://filthysushi.tumblr.com/

    "I donít get sick. I donít observe major holidays. Iím a jackhammer.Ē

  2. #2
    Can't Wait to be King Charles Brodin's Avatar
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    how on earth could be there that many words before they get to mummy.

  3. #3
    Throbbing Member Wilhelm's Avatar
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    I will mark all of the parts that sound dumb to me, in brown, and the stuff that sounds cool to me, in green.


    The story follows Navy Seal Tyler Colt and his mission in the Iraqi dessert to find a group of terrorists hiding out in a bunker. To him and his teams surprise the terrorists within the bunker turn out be nothing more then some grave robbers who have all magically died. Upon entering the bunker Tyler and his team also succumb to some mystical forces out of their control. They soon realize the bunker they have infiltrated is actually a centuries old tomb. Mayhem erupts as all the Navy seal members start turning on one another and are captivated by the forces within the tomb. Tyler is the only one to make it all the way deep within the tomb alive to find an Black Iron Sarcophagus. Itís marked with Egyptian symbols like the Ankh and Eye of Horus. Here Tyler is entranced by the forces to open up and release what is inside. But after placing his hand onto the sarcophagus he is immediately stabbed in the palm with a star shaped symbol. From then on his mind is cursed with visions of Ashurbanipal, King of AssyriaÖ..The Mummy.
    A black iron sarcophagus sounds cool.
    |\___/|
    | " " |
    ,===__/( \ / )\__===,
    / """ (") """ \
    / " \
    | \_____= =_____/ |
    ,==._/ /\ /^\ /\ \_.==,
    | _ __/" \ |] [| / "\__ _ |

  4. #4
    I'm not an alien! zyzyphus's Avatar
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    AN Black Iron Sarcophagus?

    Ugh.

  5. #5
    Throbbing Member Wilhelm's Avatar
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    Hey, they're making movies, not learning basic kindergarten grammar, sleazebag.
    Delete that post!
    |\___/|
    | " " |
    ,===__/( \ / )\__===,
    / """ (") """ \
    / " \
    | \_____= =_____/ |
    ,==._/ /\ /^\ /\ \_.==,
    | _ __/" \ |] [| / "\__ _ |

  6. #6
    bolt-on ben's Avatar
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    That is a sexist post. Sleazebag? Sleazebag? Bag? BAG? THATS A SCROTUM.

    Delete it!
    http://filthysushi.tumblr.com/

    "I donít get sick. I donít observe major holidays. Iím a jackhammer.Ē

  7. #7
    The North Remembers EML's Avatar
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    apparently the end of Dracula Untold has a stinger than links it to this "universe." Dracule Untold wasn't developed as part of this remake universe, but apparently they decided to shoe horn it in during production.

  8. #8
    Throbbing Member Wilhelm's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ben View Post
    That is a sexist post. Sleazebag? Sleazebag? Bag? BAG? THATS A SCROTUM.

    Delete it!
    Wait.
    Allow me to apologize and say that our hearts go out to anyone who has been affected by scrotums.
    |\___/|
    | " " |
    ,===__/( \ / )\__===,
    / """ (") """ \
    / " \
    | \_____= =_____/ |
    ,==._/ /\ /^\ /\ \_.==,
    | _ __/" \ |] [| / "\__ _ |

  9. #9
    bolt-on ben's Avatar
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    All of us have been affected by them in some way or another.
    http://filthysushi.tumblr.com/

    "I donít get sick. I donít observe major holidays. Iím a jackhammer.Ē

  10. #10
    I'm not an alien! zyzyphus's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by EML View Post
    apparently the end of Dracula Untold has a stinger than links it to this "universe." Dracule Untold wasn't developed as part of this remake universe, but apparently they decided to shoe horn it in during production.
    Buildin' up to Universal Monster Avengers to fight the evil Van Helsing, Oh yeeeeeeaaaaah!

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