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Thread: The Room (2003)

  1. #1
    Never Nude A really nice butterscotch pudding's Avatar
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    The Room (2003)

    Hold up. Are you telling me with this shiny new forum, in all this time, no one wrote about this masterpiece? Well buckle up motherfuckers, pour some scotchka, cause it's definitely breast cancer.



    This is Tommy Wiseau. He plays Johnny. He also wrote and directed this seven () million dollar film. Sometimes I wonder how's his sex life.



    He's a good man. Hard worker, loyal, he's even taking care of a retard that's going to school! Tommy has a future wife named Lisa. She tears him apart. But he still loves her, even though she's fat. And is a vapid bitch. And clearly a gold digger. But, everyone loves her. The whole world wants to do her since she's so beautiful.

    Did I mention Mark?



    Look at that man. He oozes charm, charisma. Everyone wants him! He's also Tommy's best friend. Don't worry if you forget that, the film will remind you every few minutes. He's also sleeping with Lisa! Emotions are running wild. Mark is starting to fall for this girl, Lisa is thinking about leaving Johnny, and Johnny will always love her because love is blind!

    Lisa, of course, is unsatisfied in life, because, as we all know, women are evil. Especially now that the computer business is tough. So she tells everyone Tommy hit her!



    Fellini himself could not have done better. By the way, that isn't just piss poor youtube resolution. The greenscreen actually does look like that. It always warm my heart to see my native San Francisco presented in all its majestic glory. Coit tower!

    As the affair continues, more and more people find out! And you know what that'll do to a group of friends. It's like sitting on an atomic bomb, waiting for it to go off! So how does this all climax? Well you'll have to watch it to find out.



    This film is legendary. Easily my favorite bad movie, there's nothing quite like it. Many have called it the Rocky Horror of our time and having gone to a midnight screening, I can definitely attest to that. There's just so many bizarre things in this film, from spontaneous football games to framed pictures of spoons. Did you know that Wiseau shot this film on both digital and 35mm at the same time? He actually built a rig to hold them up side by side. It definitely explains why nothing is ever quite framed properly.

    If there is a single film to play a drinking game to, it's this one. From the numerous shots of the Full House house, pans across the Golden Gate, the number of "Oh, hi ___" and even chicken dances that would make Gob Bluth jealous, you will be drunk within the first act. Oh did I mention there's three sex scenes within 20 minutes? All of them involving Lisa? Try not to forget me underwears.



    I love this movie. You will love it too.
    Last edited by A really nice butterscotch pudding; 09-26-2011 at 08:14 PM. Reason: Chris R needed his fucking money.

  2. #2
    Throbbing Member Wilhelm's Avatar
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    We've written about it, just no review.

    Quote Originally Posted by Assassin
    Wilhelm
    Does anyone else just picture Tommy Wiseau typing when ever they read his posts?
    Quote Originally Posted by Assassin
    haha i don't remember making this

    YOU'RE TEARING ME APART WILHELM

    ...and I respond,
    Quote Originally Posted by Wilhelm
    Thank you Assassin, this is a beautiful thread! You invited all my friends. Good thinking!

    WAIT! Everybody has betrayed me. I fed up with this site! As far as I'm concerned I hope you drop off the Earth. That's a promise!
    |\___/|
    | " " |
    ,===__/( \ / )\__===,
    / """ (") """ \
    / " \
    | \_____= =_____/ |
    ,==._/ /\ /^\ /\ \_.==,
    | _ __/" \ |] [| / "\__ _ |

  3. #3
    King of the Monstars Les Groper's Avatar
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    Gunther, Birdemic has taken the The Room mantle for now. A fuckin atrocity man.
    You know nothing about film.
    Spoiler:

    Nintendo masks their lack of graphic quality with "quirky graphics and characters".
    I can honestly say, if at 19, I was a pro baseball player, I would have exactly 100% fewer broken bats and thrown helmets.
    I could have made a better TDKR
    I feel sad for your inability to just enjoy an entertaining movie without you being critical over it's components.
    Spoiler:
    No one.

    Is talking.

    About.

    Just.

    Having.

    A.

    Gun.

    At.

    Home.

    You.

    Are.

    Ignoring.

    The.

    Defense.

    Of.

    Home.

    Aspect.

    Because.

    It.

    Trashes.

    Your.

    Defense.

    So.

    You.

    Focus.

    On.

    An.

    Arbitrary.

    Report.

    On.

    A.

    Pointless.

    Scenario.

    That.

    No one.

    Was.

    Talking.

    About.

    That's.

    Dishonest.

  4. #4
    Never Nude A really nice butterscotch pudding's Avatar
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    We should do a LSP stream. Unless we already did that. Lets do it again.

  5. #5
    King of the Monstars Les Groper's Avatar
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    sweet Wiseau
    You know nothing about film.
    Spoiler:

    Nintendo masks their lack of graphic quality with "quirky graphics and characters".
    I can honestly say, if at 19, I was a pro baseball player, I would have exactly 100% fewer broken bats and thrown helmets.
    I could have made a better TDKR
    I feel sad for your inability to just enjoy an entertaining movie without you being critical over it's components.
    Spoiler:
    No one.

    Is talking.

    About.

    Just.

    Having.

    A.

    Gun.

    At.

    Home.

    You.

    Are.

    Ignoring.

    The.

    Defense.

    Of.

    Home.

    Aspect.

    Because.

    It.

    Trashes.

    Your.

    Defense.

    So.

    You.

    Focus.

    On.

    An.

    Arbitrary.

    Report.

    On.

    A.

    Pointless.

    Scenario.

    That.

    No one.

    Was.

    Talking.

    About.

    That's.

    Dishonest.

  6. #6
    allez-vous faire ThePoler's Avatar
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    I met Tommy Wiseau and went to a screening of The Room earlier this year.

  7. #7
    Never Nude A really nice butterscotch pudding's Avatar
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  8. #8
    bolt-on ben's Avatar
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    Have you guys watched The Tommy Wi-Show yet? It is genius.

  9. #9
    Never Nude A really nice butterscotch pudding's Avatar
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    Actually thats what made me review this. Wi-show was awful though. I don't know why he keeps trying to make everyone think he purposely made a bad film when it's clear he was trying to make a legitimate drama.

  10. #10
    Weed Demon
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    after seeing the youtube videos of clips from the room i tried watching it

    i got to the sex scene (roughly 10, 15 minutes in) and turned it off

    i've never watched something that bad before where i physically just couldn't continue, y'know whatta mean?

    anyways, tommy grew on me with his tim & eric skit



    i watched the tommy wi-show and holy fuck is it horrible but for some reason im excited for episode 2

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